08 April 2012

Worth it?

We lost another cadet yesterday. He was killed instantly in a car accident.

I knew who he was - he was in D Flight when I was C Flight cadre during BCT 2010. I yelled at him when he screwed up, and even laughed at him when he did something embarrassing.

I'm not proud of that.

He came to BSU a couple times. I don't think I ever talked to him there.

And now he's gone. And I found out more about his life from General Clark than I ever knew from talking to him.

I'm not proud of that.

Was he saved? Is he in heaven now? Why didn't I do more for him?

I could've done more. I didn't have to laugh at him. I could've talked to him.
You have never talked to a mere mortal. Nations, cultures, arts, civilizations - these are mortal, and their is to ours as the life of a gnat. But it is immortals we joke with, work with, marry, snub, and exploit - immortal horrors or everlasting splendors.
- C.S. Lewis, The Weight of Glory